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Of course I am referring to Rich Johnston, author of "Lying in the Gutters" -- Comic Book Resources' pathetic gossip column. Every week Johnston partakes in his speculation and -- dare I say? -- tomfoolery.
But this week, he has crossed a line! In the column Johnston attempts to pass of the discovery of the humor on this page from Justice Society of America #1 as a "scoop."
FOOL!
Anyone with even the tiniest atom of intelligence must know that Diamondrock -- this blog's proprietor and my friend and protege -- posted about that page two weeks ago!
And since no credit was given or solicited I will do what supervillians do: destroy Rich Johnston.
I declare myself to be the new arbiter of comic book rumors. All tips and tidbits will now be direct to Doctor Polaris. Fail in this and the consequences will be dire.
Welcome, friends, to the First Annual Title Undetermined Blogoversary Spectacular. Yes, it was one year ago today that I made my first post here on the blog. But it wasn't until a few months later that all the awesome powers were unleashed when Doctor Polaris and Azrael joined the team.
And they're here with me today to celebrate this momentous occasion. So continue on, my friends and allies. Here's what you have to look forward to:
- The mind-numbing story of Azrael's fateful -- and final -- battle with the terrible villain who has plagued him these past few weeks.
- Comments and opinions from the Magnetic Maestro himself on the stunning revelations found in Justice League of America #4
- And here, shocking revelations and cataclysmic portents of "The World That's Coming."
They made a lot of noise, of course. Cats don't like being trapped in enclosed spaces. But that was all part of the plan. The cats would draw him out, and when he toppled this can I'd be ready.
On the evening in question it was nearing midnight -- the cats in the can had finally settled down. And yet, there remained no sign of my elusive nemesis. But I knew he would come, and at 11:53 I was proved right
A shadowy figure emerged from the shadows just as a heavy rain began to fall. In retrospect, I should have recognized the obvious dramatic significance of that. But at the time, I was too focused on trying to discover who it was. It was dark in that alleyway, and I don't get free nightvision lenses for my mask anymore...
The figure approached the trash can, and I knew my time to strike had come! I leapt from my hiding place, flaming sword blazing with the fury of the righteous! The villain seemed undeterred.
"We meet at last, Azrael," he whispered through the pounding rain. His voice was cold and his features were hidden by a heavy black raincoat.
"You know who I am?" I replied with incredulity.
"Oh, we certainly do," the villain replied. I could detect a slight smile in his voice. I'd had enough, and moved to strike. But then...
NINJAS!
From everywhere around me there appeared ninjas! Clad in black and wielding deadly blades, they surrounded me! I narrowed my eyes at the villain, but he only laughed -- as villains do.
"If you survive, Azrael, we will meet again," he said as he vanished from sight. But I had no time to deal with him. There were ninjas everywhere!
And so, battle was joined in the freezing rain of Gotham City. Ninjas rushed all about me, but it didn't matter... My battle skills are nearly without equal. (I was Batman for awhile, remember?)
And when the last ninja fell upon the wet pavement, I leaned against the building's facade ot catch my breath. As I steadied myself, my eyes fell upon the trash can I had placed as bait. It had been toppled... And it was empty.
It's not over.
Yes, the villainous force facing off with the latest version of the Justice League has been revealed. And it is... Solomon Grundy?!
*snort*
*chortle*
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Forgive me, forgive me. It's just that... Well... I've worked with Solomon before. He's not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer... Even when he's smart.
And yes, I'm well aware that Solomon Grundy is endowed with a new personality each time he dies. Don't insult me. My point is... Well, it's that Solomon has had his role to play. And now he's going against type. And that's not going to make many of us happy.
You see, there's always been a division of labor in the world of supervillainy. You've got your brilliant geniuses endowed with fabulous powers and even more fabulous fashion sense (such as myself). And then you've got the dumb muscle. Like dear Solomon Grundy.
Yes, some have made the crossover... See my dear departed colleague Blockbuster. And then see what happened to him.
These divisions exist for a reason. Those of us who know how to pose and shout off one-liners... We're the ones who should be instituting grand plans to destroy the Justice League of America. We often fail, yes. But we do so with style. And judging from Solomon's attire, it's clear doesn't doesn't have the chops for it.
It's taken what? Four, five issues for him to finally reveal his role? Fool! That's not how it's done! If you want to get the League attention you assault a major city with some sort of Doomsday Device! Then you'll get on television.
But I digress. My point is that it should have been my moment. My time to shine! And instead it's gone to another pasty faced thug in a bad suit.
I will have my revenge.
I'm absolutely loving Kurt Busiek's work on Superman. It's got everything I would've asked for. But it's also got something I didn't ask for:
Arion.
You may be asking: who is Arion? Well, I'll admit that I didn't really know until he woke up in a bed with two naked women in seventeenth century France and got annoyed at twenty-first century Superman. And he had me when he called the fact that he was dead in the future "absurdly inconvenient."
So we've got a cranky, immortal sorcerer who dresses like a 1650's French nobleman. That's hot. And he calls people names and acts like an ass... But you still know he's right. Because he may be a bitter bastard... But he's still frickin' Arion.
My big hope is that Kurt Busiek's "secret mystery project" (the one he left Sword of Atlantis for) is actually an Arion ongoing/mini. Busiek did say that after seeing how Carlos Pacheco draws Arion that he "wouldn't be surprised if he gets his own series again."
Bitter, angry protagonists are in vogue these days. Look at the show House. I can see parallels between them here already. House is a total ass... But he's almost always right. And Arion? We've seen him be an ass. Let's see if he's right.
They could send Arion out to solve magical mysteries that no one else can deal with. He could have a diverse set of apprentices who are in awe of his brilliance and struggle with his personality "quirks." It'd be brilliant!
Regardless, I hope this version of Arion sticks around. As long as he keeps the outfit, that is...
They continue to jabber on, day in and day out. And such pedestrian concerns! I remember the good old days... The days when things people said were important. Even vital. And when they always ended with an exclamation point.
But today such things are hidden away. Inside foolish caption boxes, more often than not. Fools! The moment we stop saying what we feel (and by "saying what we feel" I don't mean whining like someone) is the moment we become less than human. Or whatever kind of alien you may happen to be.
Declare your villainous plans! Do not hide in the shadows like Brad Meltzer's mystery villain. Three issues and he hasn't even gotten the JLA out of whatever damn cave they're hiding in. The fool. If it were me plotting against the League?
Page 2, Panel 4 and we'd already be throwing it down in the middle of Metropolis. I might still lose... But dammit, I'd lose with style.
Wow... So It's been awhile, eh? So what's been happening lately in the world of comics... Justice Society of America was rock solid. Atom continues to break new ground in the realms of "Hell Yes!" And Paul Dini shows that he's the best man out there for writing the Joker. Meanwhile, I'm feeling unexpectedly fantastic.
I guess I'm just on one of those tremendous highs that people sometimes get. Real life has actually forced the blog to take a back seat for a few days (though I guess it's almost been a week, hasn't it?) But I think I'm back in the swing of things. Maybe...
I see that this post is going to be very light on the comics commentary. That's okay, though. Sometimes we need to step back and look at things from a greater distance.
Lately I've been working on some of my personal comic projects (I've got a few). I've been sketching out character designs and writing up scripts. It goes as it goes... And though my art skills aren't quite up to snuff, I do feel that some things are finally coming together.
It's funny... It seems that a great many people who read comics want to write/draw them as well. And I do; I definitely do. But it astonishes me how little desire I have to write for characters I love like Batman and Superman. Maybe it's because then I wouldn't be able to enjoy them as much. Or maybe it's because I know that someone else can do a better job.
Regardless, I only really want to do the things that are wholly original. And I've got a million and one ideas bouncing around in my head -- they multiply daily -- that I need to get out on paper. And so it goes.
Expect one of these days for me to link to a sketch or a finished project. Just don't expect it any time soon. Do expect more craziness and less introspection when normal posting resumes tomorrow.
Keep hope alive.
A page from this week's eagerly anticipated Justice Society of America #1:
Though in this case "close" is relatively literal... The elderly woman who lives in the apartment next to me, to be exact. Sometimes I help her carry her groceries. Her cat has gone missing.
The only logical assumption is that the same criminal who knocked over the garbage cans -- thus depriving me of CSI's denouement -- has struck against my neighbor's cat. She has not been seen for two days. And I know that this is an attempt to get at me.
But I will not let it weaken my resolve. I will find the cat -- and the criminal -- no matter what it takes. I may no longer be welcome as the ruthless defender of Gotham City, but that doesn't mean I won't strike back when evil comes to my door.
I'm going to set a trap. I'll catch him... Whoever he is...
Don't talk to me. My head hurts.
Anyway, I hooked up with my old college buddy Doctor Domino last night. At least I think it was night... I'm not even sure what time it is now.
Right. So we started drinking. Drinking a lot and talking about old times. About all the nights spent playing Dungeons & Dragons and all the days spent destroying our enemies. Those were good times.
Christ, my head hurts. I need some asprin or something.
Yeah, so the dean of the university didn't like us much. We were too smart for him. We were too smart for all of them. The fools. They couldn't appreciate our genius.
Yes, I know that sounds cliched. But it's the truth, dammit. Once Doctor Domino (he wasn't a doctor yet, of course) built a bunch of giant dominos and destroyed one of the science labs. He was trying to prove to me that pure wooden dominos were superior to ones including metal components. Fool.
But I'm rambling again. I think I need to get to sleep. Or something. Just let me say one more thing: my alma mater used to have one of the nation's largest fraternity systems.
Not anymore.
Am I the only one out there who thinks that Jericho (of Teen Titans fame) is incredibly and irredeemably lame?
I can't explain why I think he's lame -- or why I'm using a word to describe him that I almost never use under any circumstances. But "lame" is the best way I can possibly describe him. It's not the old muttonchops either (thought those were extremely lame). He's lost that facial hair disaster and he's still lame.
I think his problem is... Crap. I don't even know what the problem is. All I know is that I look at Jericho and think: "man, you are a serious lame-o." I've got no reasons. I've got no understandings. I just know that Joey "Joey" Wilson is incredibly lame.
Why do only the good ones stay dead?
Why exactly have I never read a Hellboy comic before? I loved the movie and enjoyed the animation... But why did I never crack open those gloriously illustrated comics?
Well, today I got the chance to read most of the major Hellboy story arcs. And wow was I blown away. I've never see such things on page before. It has greatly humbled me (some of my own projects deal with the occult and the supernatural -- though not in the way Hellboy does).
I mean, I've never seen an exchange like this before in a comic:
And no matter how much I may love Batman (and I do... I really do) I have to say that nobody -- nobody -- throws a punch like Hellboy:
And also note another thing about those two images. Something very important that shows exactly how well Mignola understands comics. Both have monkeys.
Hail Mike Mignola.
No time for a real post! Take this:
God, I love Batman.
(From Arkham Asylum: Living Hell #6)
I Was watching a CSI rerun last night when I heard a noise outside my window. That in and of itself is not an uncommon occurence (especially considering the kind of neighborhood I live in). But there was something particularly... Sinister about this noise.
Grabbing my gear I quickly prepared myself for battle. I leap back onto the couch and then burst through the window to the street below, shattering the glass and striking a pose which I'm sure would have made an excellent splash page.
Nimbly touching down I discovered something... Sinister rifling through the garbage. I activated my flaming gauntlets and in the light of their cleansing fires I saw it:
A raccoon.
A supervillain, no. But a villain no less. The creature had overturned the garbage can, spilling the contents all about. I had to spend about twenty minutes picking it up and I missed the end of the show. (And I'm pretty sure I lost my security deposit over that window, too...)
But that wasn't the end of the story. After I cleaned the gunk off my gauntlets and returned to TV room I heard another crash! I again rushed to the scene (this time I took the stairs) and discovered that the cans had been knocked over again.
Once, I could attribute it to a raccoon working alone. But it doesn't take the World's Greatest Detective to realize that twice is more than simply an isolated incident. It's an attack.
Someone's out to get me. And I'm going to find out who.
They began as friends. Allies. They were united in a common cause. They sought to change the world. But as so often happens, they began to drift apart. Different ideologies, different methods... They could not stay friends forever. And when they finally clashed... It was a clash of titans.
Do I speak of The Dark Knight Returns' Superman vs. Batman? Civil War's Captain America vs. Iron Man? No my friends... I speak of the greatest showdown in comic history:
HITLER VS. STALIN
It doesn't matter how I came upon it... What matters is that I have read it. And now I bring it before you.
It begins as all great stories do: with Adolf Hitler engaging in forbidden occult magics. But suddenly... An explosion! Nazi Stormtroopers fall left and right. Some mighty force has invaded Hitler's compound... But who could it be?
Yes, it is Joseph Stalin. Endowned with his mystic Marshal's Baton ("It is the personification of unbending willpower for victory of the multinational Soviet people!"), Stalin and Hitler clash.
Hitler quickly gains the upper hand, but it cannot last. For Stalin remembers the lessons taught to him by his teacher, Lenin. With "the laws of historic inevitability" on his side, Stalin cannot lose.
Ignoring Hitler's pleas, Stalin is prepared to bring an end to the battle and deliver his coup de grace. But Hitler has one more trick up his sleeve:
A super-powered zombie Frankenstein's monster stictched together from the bodies of fallen SS troopers and animated with magic.Hitler takes the moment to escape, and his zombie super-soldier takes Stalin to task...
And fails.Hand to hand combat is joined, and the result is... Decisive.
Meanwhile, Hitler prepares to flee to his hidden refuge in South America. Launching his "Weapon of Revenge" he attempts to destroy Stalin. He succeeds... Or does he?
The cataclysmic energies released, Hitler and Stalin are both destroyed. But it is not their final meeting. As Hitler awaits his entry into Valhalla, the specter of Stalin visits him one final time... Shattering Hitler's hope of immortality.
And so, confined to the pits of hell, Hitler's reign of terror is brought to an end. But what of Stalin?That, we may never know.
I am totally loving the new Freedom Fighters series. It's different, clever, and so very, very cool. And they keep throwing in new versions of old Golden Age characters. I love new versions of old Golden Age characters.
I just wish I could figure out who the mysterious unnamed figure bathed in neon light might be.
Wait a minute... Mysterious figure? Neon light? Would they dare? Could it be? Someone catch me: I'm fainting from the awesome. Because I think that's NEON THE UNKNOWN.
For those of you who don't know the Unknown, he's one of those many obscure Golden Age characters. He also happens to be my favorite obscure Golden Age character. Because he's just so weird and odd and nonsensical. And he's got a really interesting origin.
The original Neon the Unknown was Tom Corbet (or Corbett, according to some records). A member of the French Foreign Legion, Corbet and his comrades were betrayed by their commanding officer and sent off to die in the deserts of northern Africa.
And die they did, from exposure and thirst. All save Tom Corbet. Corbet was on his last legs when he discovered a mysterious pool of glowing liquid. And as people are wont to do when they're dying of thirst in the middle of the desert, Corbet drinks it.
In the real world people die from doing stuff like that. But since Tom Corbet lived in the world of comics he was instead granted amazing "neonic powers" and a snazzy costume (with cape, natch).
Since this was 1939, there was only one thing he could do: become a superhero. And indeed, he was recruited by Uncle Sam as a member of the original Freedom Fighters.
But it didn't last long. On December 6, 1941 Neon the Unknown and the other Freedom Fighters were warned by Uncle Sam of a terrible impending disaster. Not the type to shy away from such things, the Freedom Fighters rushed to the site of the predicted tragedy: Pearl Harbor.
And on that day of infamy Neon the Unknown died in the Japanese assault.
And yet, I have always found myself drawn to the character, despite his meager appearances. Though the name "Neon" was used for a one shot Superboy villain in the 90's, there has been no direct successor to the real Neon the Unknown -- one of the first superheroes of the Golden Age (forgotten though he may be).
No successor, that is, until today. For though I may be wrong I do hope that the mysterious unnamed figure bathed in neon light is indeed a new Neon the Unknown.
Don't buy it? Here's food for thought: the mysterious figure's ally in the latest issue of Freedom Fighters is a certain Red Bee. The original Golden Age Red Bee made his first appearance in 1940's Hit Comics #1. Alongside a certain Unknown.
Edit: it has come to my attention that the mysterious unnamed figure bathed in neon light is actually a new Invisible Hood. Though that is almost as rad, it has the consequence of rendering this entire post moot. Plus, it means no Neon the Unknown for me. Phooey.
I don’t usually do this, but I read something recently that got me really riled up. So here's a post that's not about comics.
Not long ago I discovered this article where a man purporting to be a scientist makes certain -- how shall we say? -- dubious claims. A professor at the University of Central Florida, Physics Professor Costas Efthimiou claims that he has mathematically disproved the existence of vampires.
As a supporter of the Awesome Power of Science, I have to say that Prof. Efthimiou is full of crap
But before I use simple logic and a cursory knowledge of fantasy and folklore to debunk him, I should make one thing clear: I don't believe in vampires. Furthermore, I am not one of those people who believes that vampires are "cool" or "sexy."
Indeed, if I did meet a slavering, blood-crazed nosferatu I'd stab it in the heart. On the other hand, if I met an attractive, angsting creature of the night who bemoaned his cruel existence as an immortal I'd stab him in the heart. I'm not a fan of vampires.
Anyway, Prof. Efthimiou's "proof" is based completely on the idea that if a vampire bites someone then that person will turn into a vampire. Prof. Efthimiou then extrapolates, claming that the human race would be completely overrun by vampires within a few short months.
But Prof. Efthimiou's claims betray a woeful ignorance of both basic vampire folklore and their appearance in fiction over the years. It has rarely if ever been a part of vampire stories that a simple bite will turn someone into a vampire. Indeed, everything from the original Dracula to the modern radness of Batman and the Mad Monk shows that simply drinking a person's blood doesn't turn them into a vampire. You have to drain them completely -- and even that doesn't always work.
Besides, even if a simple bite was all it took to turn someone into a vampire the human race still wouldn't be overrun. The vampires wouldn't allow it. They'd destroy their victims before they let them rise as additional vampires. It's common sense. Vampires have been portrayed as many things, but generally stupid isn't one of them.
In some cases, competition is a good thing. But when it comes to a source of food, it's usually not. And vampires -- who need something very specific to survive -- aren't going to go out every night and create their own competition. It would be in their vested interest to remain one of -- if not the only -- consumer of their prey in a given area.
And so with that I -- a person who hated math in high school and never went beyond trigonometry -- have debunked the claims of someone who works with numbers for a living. Game, set, and match.
At 53,302 words my novel is a tour de force of epic proportions.
A fantasy sci-fi mystery thriller, my story (currently untitled) is about a brilliant doctor/scientist (who is in no way based on anyone I know) that is somehow granted amazing powers that may or may not be magnetic in nature.
Using these powers for the betterment of himself, our hero travels the country wronging rights, solving mysteries, and sweeping dozens of ladies off their feet with his magnetic personality. (ha!)
But all is not well for our protagonist, as he is opposed by his archenemy, the less attractive and much less intelligent Val Bordan (who is in no way based on anyone I know).
Of course, our hero (villain?) bests Val Bordan in every contest of wit, skill, and gamesmanship imaginable, steals his girlfriend, and then becomes President of the United States.
If you know any publishers have them call me.
Was that... Could that have been...
The worst issue of 52 ever?
Let's consider the many, many things wrong with 52: Week 28:
- Red Tornado appears, but he doesn't save the day.
- Batwoman neither dies nor does anything interesting. Pick one!
- Egg Fu did not appear.
- Adam Strange... Angsting?!
- The revelation that the terrifying Emerald Eye of Ekron is apparnetly nothing more than a piece of boring Green Lantern equipment.
- The Question is still dying.
- Richard Dragon doesn't appear, let alone kick anyone in the face.
- We don't get to see Ralph Dibny go psychoer.
In all seriousness, I was extremely underwhelmed by this issue. It might be my least favorite issue so far of the entire series. It just felt wrong.
But I've got to say... The preview for next week looks miiiighty encouraging...
I'm dead serious. If you're not reading Jonah Hex why aren't you reading Jonah Hex? Tell me, please. Because I really want to know. It's a consistently well-written book about a disfigured wild west bounty hunter who single-handedly brings his own sense of justice to the American frontier. What more do you want?
There's lots of kicking and punching and shooting and chopping. And even more one-liners. Good one-liners.
Jonah Hex isn't a perfect man by any stretch of the imagination (though he's a better man than he thinks he his). But he's not a 90's grim n' gritty anti-hero either.
Jonah Hex (along with the Kents, among others) really did hold the line during some of the darkest days in America's history. And you can experience his hardcore justice every month.
Why aren't you reading Jonah Hex?
Oh yes my friends... It's another one of those posts. I've got me a mission, and I'm sticking to it. So let's move right on to the points brought to my attention by the arrival of DC's February Solicitations.
You see, I've noticed a... Curious trend regarding Casssandra. Bear with me for a moment.
When the downward spiral began, it was very clear that they were leading Cass away from being Batgirl. She'd thrown the identity away at the end of her series and it seemed that that was the last time we'd see her in costume.
Her appearances in Robin continued this trend. Rather than being a costumed hero/villain she was the leader of the League of Assassins. And then there was the Supergirl solicit that indicated that Cassandra Cain and "her League of Assassins" would be going up against Supergirl.
But then something changed (I'm not quite sure what). Cassandra was announced as being a member of Deathstroke's Titans East... As Batgirl. As many posters and bloggers in various places have noticed, this seems to completely contradict DC's original course for her. And as the February solicits show, the "postponed" story seems to have been retooled... Making it Batgirl versus Supergirl rather than Cassandra Cain versus Supergirl.
Now, as far as I can tell they originally decided to stick her in the League of Assassins and then changed their minds. Tactics were changed either because Geoff Johns had what was perceived as a good idea (the most likely explanation) or because they misinterpreted the reaction to her evilification as "fans are angry because she's not Batgirl anymore."
I'll admit that I haven't completely given up hope (though that's probably just me being naive). After all, the solicitation for Supergirl #14 doesn't say why Batgirl and Supergirl are fighting. I mean, how many times have Batman and Superman fought?
But yeah, I'm not holding my breath.
Some insist that Hal Jordan is acting incredibly out of character in that issue. Clearly some do not know Hal Jordan half as well as I.
Yes, Hal Jordan has a messiah complex. Yes, Hal Jordan believes the world revolves around him. And yes, Hal Jordan has a deep sense of "responsibility." But what some are forgetting is that Hal Jordan is also incredibly stupid.
This I know beyond a shadow of a doubt. We have clashed on numerous occasions. Were he not beneath me I might consider him my "personal nemesis." (as is, he ranks only as my "arch-enemy")
As is, he doesn't need a "personal nemesis." He is his own nemesis. This is a man who is constantly and annoyingly taken out by exposed buttresses and bat-seat cushions.
I cannot say that I am glad that Hal Jordan was imprisoned and tortured. After all, it was not I who imprisoned and tortured him (if it had been, I would have employed some sort of brilliant, elaborate deathtrap/torture device rather than the simple and expedient method of breaking bones).
Hal Jordan is nothing more and nothing less than a jackass with a massive superiority complex. I'm glad I'm not like that.
Comic book message boards are scary, scary places. I don't know if any of you out there in blogland ever frequent message boards, but I do on occasion. Before I discovered the reasoned, ass-kicking world of comic blogs I received most of my comic "discussion" from message boards. It was not a pretty time.
I do on occasion sidle back to see what is up on that end of the comic book world. Alas, I was not impressed by what I saw.
I was immediately struck by the following post topic: Should Guy Marry Wonder Woman? (With Poll!)
The "Guy" mentioned is of course Guy Gardner. Good luck with that, Message Board Poster!
Message boards also prove the following: if you bitch and moan and complain enough about Jericho not being in Teen Titans then Geoff Johns will bring him back to life just to shut your whiny, misspelling, non-capitalizing ass up.
That's while I'll stick with the blogs. Here I can say that I'm annoyed that Cassandra Cain has been turned into a one note villain and have people agree or disagree with me in a considerate fashion. (side note: 52 pissed me off this week by royally yanking my chain. "Daughter of Cain" my ass...)
So feel proud, my friends. Yes, we have different opinions. Yes, we are full of ourselves. But we have a reason to be. We know that "too" (as in also, in addition to) has two "O"s.
Well, I had planned to post yesterday, but that sort of fell through after I ended up stranded for two hours on a boat off the coast of Japan.
Speaking of Japan, I had the good fortune to view the animated Hellboy movie Sword of Storms today. I was delighted to discover that the always fantastic Ron Perlman was reprising his role and Hellboy.
I was also intrigued to discover that Sword of Storms was to feature a great deal of Japanese mythology and mythological creatures. I was very impressed by the film, as they managed to get both their Japanese and their Japanese mythology right.
But their samurai still sheathed their swords backwards. Why can't Westerners get that right?
Anyway, the movie as a whole was quite good. It featured a lot of fun action and I really can't imagine anyone but Ron Perlman doing Hellboy. He's just so damn perfect. I really hope they make more of these.
Wow. I've got to say that Evil Skeets is far more evil that I expected him to be. I mean, sure; we knew he was going to be evil. He's Evil Skeets, after all.
But really. Am I the only one who was slightly disturbed at finding out where the metal Evil Skeets is built from comes from? Definitely one of the freakier revelations coming out of 52.
How the hell did Evil Skeets get so powerful? He's supposed to be a weird security droid. Why would he have been built out of that mysterious gold metal anyway? I feel that there are more disturbing revelations yet to come about Evil Skeets.
This time tomorrow: I get really pissed over the revelations about The Question.
In the proud tradition of Chris's Invincible Super-Blog, here's a woman kicking a dude in the face:
So it looks the the lovely, brilliant, and extremely talented Gail Simone is ushering Birds of Prey into a new era.
It looks like the book is going to be awfully different from what it used to be. Very different from the old days when it was sort of a Black Canary/Oracle team-up. One part of that team-up has left. And there's a whole new crew coming in.
And I for one am extremely excited. Big Barda? Ohhh yesss. And it looks like Manhunter might be getting some additional play as well. And of course, Oracle and Huntress aren't going anywhere.
But me, I'm trying to figure out who the heck this new Judomaster is. Did I miss something? Because I know the old one died, but I didn't know there was a new one. Is this her first apprearance?
I'll say this: she's got a ridiculous name, a gaudy costume, and she hurts people with judo.
I'm in love.
Ah yes. With a title like that, I could only be here to talk about one thing. And let me apologize to those of you who don't give a damn about Cassandra Cain: I'm sorry you're such a cold-hearted bastard.
Seriously, though. There's been a great deal of Cassandra Cain related news out and about recently. So much, in fact, that Wizard Magazine has named her their "Character to Watch." In a normal universe not populated by evil genius Cassie Cains this would make me ecstatic.
But I'm not feeling that so much. Wizard makes it very clear that Cassandra will "continue on her villainous rampage." Words cannot describe my feelings on that.
It goes on to quote Dan DiDio, wherein he says:
"I'm glad to see there was a reaction created. It shows me that people care about the character and want to see something happen with her.
Well, Mr. DiDio, you're certainly half right. The reaction does indeed show that people care about her character. And I guess you're more than half right in that the reaction also shows that people want to see something happen with her. What you and all the other people at DC seem to be getting wrong is what we want to see happen to her.
I'd say that the "reaction" has been mostly negative. The only people who have actually liked the direction DC has taken Cass almost always preface their remarks with "I've never been a fan of the character" or "I never read Batgirl." All this seems to indicate to me that most of Cassandra's actual fans don't like what's being done with her.
Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be much light at the end of the tunnel. Cass is slated to be a villain in an upcoming (albeit delayed) issue of Supergirl. And in the Wizard snippet above Geoff Johns (a writer who has made a career out of fixing screwed over characters) talks about how he's going to continue screwing Cassie over in Teen Titans.
Though that could just be an interpretation colored by my own personal feelings. Mr. Johns says:
"There's a pretty big leap to her becoming what she's become. You're going to see the exact nature of why and how in 'Titans East.'"
Indeed, it is a big leap from the Cassandra Cain I loved for almost seventy-five issues to the illogical, poorly thought out caricature we met in Robin OYL. But rather than try to fix this travesty Mr. Johns has decided (or has been editorially mandated) to run with it.
And so he will provide us with an explanation. And it will -- I'm sad to say -- probably make some sense. Because Mr. Johns is an expert at making things fit into continuity.
But no matter what he does I will still be incredibly unhappy. I will be less unhappy if she is turned back to the side of the angels. But I will still be unhappy. Because the decisions that have been made (regardless of who has made them) have placed a stain on my favorite character that will probably never come completely clean.
And though I'm not someone who believes I "own" the character because I'm a fan I do believe that it makes some sense for writers to consider what the fans of a particular characer like. After all, we're the ones buying the books and showing up at conventions and writing insipid blog entries.
Now before I sign off I would like deliver a huge thank you to Gail Simone. As Cassandra has been ravaged across the DCU (being called "deranged" among other things) the one place where she has actually been mentioned in a positive light is Birds of Prey. More than once Barbara and others have said nice things about Cassandra. And even the little things mean a lot. So again, thank you.
Now I bid you good night and ask you to keep hope alive.
Well, I fully intended to post another whiny rant about the latest horrible thing that's happened to Cassandra Cain (looks like Geoff Johns is keeping her a villain). But then I discovered that this would actually be Title Undetermined's 200th post.
So a big thanks to Doctor Polaris and Azrael for making things around here such a rousing success. And here's something Batgirl related after all: a beautiful James Jean sketch of an unused Batgirl cover. He's most famous for his work on Fables, but his covers for Batgirl are just as beautiful. They also marked Mr. Jean's first work with superheroes.
Keep hope alive.
Here's a screencap from the usually delightful Onion:
You would be pleased to check out the lower right portion of that oversized image.
Well, I thought it was funny.
But I should make a distinction. Like most religions, there are a great many sects within the greater Church of Crime. The one promoted by Bruno Mannheim? We'll call that Orthodox Crimeology. Not my cup of tea. I'm not particularly keen on the consumption of flesh -- either literally or by means of transubstantiation.
I'm more of a Reformist Crimeologist. Sure, we like crime. But we also like getting together for bingo and potlucks. (Black Manta makes a mean quiche!)
Anyway, I invite any and all to consider joining the Church of Crime. We may have many disparate views, but one thing is constant: we really love robbing banks.
It's Halloween. Let's talk about something scary. And what's scarier than pure, undiluted evil?
See 52: Week 25. Wherein we are reintroduced to Bruno Mannheim, and once again reminded why Darkseid is the DCU's true evil incarnate.
Confused? You may very well be. Because if you've been reading DC Comics much in the past decade you might wonder why I just called that guy who always got beat up by Superman "true evil incarnate." But he was that, and is again, because the people in charge now know the best way to use Darkseid.
Namely, not use him at all.
Evil is what hides in the shadows. It is the thing that lurks behind you, and in the darkest corner of your soul. And it's the thing that starkly stares you in the face every day of your life.
We see Bruno Mannheim -- who is but a man -- consume human flesh and we are revolted. We seem him smash a man's skull to bits and we are terrified. We are horrified and we are fascinated. And we know that that is evil in its purest form.
And yet, as 52 tells us, Bruno Mannheim was not always this way:
"Five years ago Bruno had an experience, a close encounter with forces from beyond human comprehension. A dark angel of living granite placed its stinking, smoking hand against his chest and held it there as it whispered to him the sickening secrets of the dark side. Held it there until the heart within was blackened and shriveled beyond repair."
And so, by having Darkseid not be seen or named -- by only knowing what he's done -- we see the full extent of his evil. We watch in mute horror as Bruno Mannheim commits the most terrifying atrocities imaginable.
But even as we watch this Apostle of the Dark Side we know that there's something worse out there. Something darker and more terrible that we can possibly comprehend.
And that's evil.
Chris over at the mighty Invincible Super-Blog said something along these lines last week. I'm going to echo it here: I really don't give a damn about Jor-El.
And though I've enjoyed most of what Geoff Johns has done, I'm exteremely wary about his teaming up with Richard Donner on Action. Because I really am not that big a fan of what Donner did.
Yes, I know that Superman: The Movie was the first real super-hero movie. But I have some serious issues with it. And foremost among them is exactly what Chris says: the constant, unending obsession with Jor-El and Krypton.
I mean, c'mon. At their worst the Kryptonians are "The Assholes of Space." And at their best they're arrogant bumblers. Hell, in the animated continuity they created a world-ravaging, evil artificial intelligence. Not the best idea anyone has ever had.
But the movies' ridiculous Krypton is just... Well, it's ridiculous. How could anyone possibly live in those giant, idiotic crystal structures? There aren't any chairs. And I'm pretty sure there aren't any toilets either. And they clearly can't lock the doors -- a fact that leads into the entire plot of Superman Returns.
And while I'm on that subject... I loved Superman Returns. I literally wept tears of joy about the fact that I was finally able to see a Superman movie on the big screen. But I really wish they'd broken completely with the previous films.
They didn't need to do an origin film, but there were a lot of unnecessary (in my view) nods to the Donner films (besides, this means I'll never see my brilliant trilogy of Superman films on the big screen). Let's hope Superman Returns Again Gives us some sort of real menace.
So in conclusion: can we stop talking about Jor-El and Krypton for awhile? I mean, we haven't heard Bruce Wayne angst this much about his parents in recent years. And he has a lot more cause for it than Superman...
As you know, I myself am quite religious. Though He brainwashed me and continues to haunt me as a malevolent spirit, I nonetheless continue to venerate the venerable Saint Dumas. (may praising Him free me from the unending, unceasing torment!) But we see very little of the religion of most of the others in the DCU.
Does Hal Jordan attend church? Is Superman really a Methodist? Is Batman an Episcopalian or what? I know Huntress is a lapsed Catholic (we've got a lot in common, what with the horrible, crushing, unending guilt).
The only religious types we routinely see are the craaaazy cult types. Like Mr. Bruno Mannheim's Church of Crime, The Kali-Yuga Kobra Cult (or is that Kult?), and yes, my very own Order of St. Dumas. (may His name be praised!)
I guess what I'm saying is that people like me don't seem to have a place in the DCU anymore. Now I'm not saying they kicked me out because I'm religious (though that's as good a theory as any). But when was the last time you saw a superhero who really believed in something?
And no, Zauriel doesn't count.
Over at CBR there's an interview with Adam Beechen, the writer best known around here for destroying Cassandra Cain. Let's deconstruct some of his quotes, shall we?
"Cassandra, having discovered she was not the only child to be raised by master assassin David Cain and that she'd essentially been lied to growing up, decided to become a force for the justice of her own definition, taking over the League of Assassins to use as her instrument."
Let me again reiterate something that every Batgirl fan has said regarding this so-called "motive": Cassandra already knew there were others. This was not something new. She discovered in the last arc of her solo series that David Cain had trained a great many other children in addition to herself.
She did not freak out. She did not go crazy. She did not start killing people.
And even if she hadn't known, why would that cause her to flip? The premise that she "discovered she'd been lied to" is absurd. Of course she'd been lied to. She already knew that. Her entire life was a lie. That's why she ran away from him.
And the idea that she'd become jealous of this other girl is even more absurd. Jealous because Daddy loved someone else? Ridiculous. Cassandra hates her father. She doesn't want anything to do with him. Why why why why why would she give a damn if he raised someone else in addition to her? Let's look at another quote:
"It's a big change, a fundamental change, and it represents a big twist in the longtime path of the character, her quest to overcome her upbringing. The way I think about it is, I know lots of people who've struggled against bad decisions or circumstances in their lives for a long time, only to suddenly backslide into their previous behavior."
Again, no. You can only "backslide" into a cruel, vengeful murderer if you were one to begin with. Which Cassandra Cain most certainly was not. She killed one person. She was sent to do it when she was a child -- she didn't know what death was. When she saw it, it horrified her, and she ran away. She never killed again (until all this awful OYL crap).
I'm sick of hearing all the bullshit about Cassandra being "a killer, born and bred." That is complete and utter crap. She was nothing of the sort. She was the child of killers and was trained to be a killer. But she was never a killer. Never.
And I will never accept any story that makes her into one.
The chaos? The death? It's all me. I so much despise those fools that I have set them against one another for my amusement. Iron Man has been dead for months. I've just been moving him around like a marionette with my awesome magnetic powers.
But I'm beginning to think that it's getting out of hand. First of all, people are actually buying it. I'd hoped to destroy the Marvel Universe from the inside out by shattering the foundations upon which it is built. Apparently the philistines among the consumer class are duller than I expected.
How foolish are they to accept such obvious plot-holes and such ridiculously contrived explanations? Oh, they cloned a god, did they? From a hair left behind from the very first meeting of the Avengers? That makes perfect sense. Idiots.
At least the Marvel Universe is spiraling into chaos. And I sincerely doubt that it will come out of it as squeaky clean as my stomping grounds have. If I'm lucky, someone will conveniently off Magneto before all is said and done...
Alas, Jon Standing Bear. We hardly knew ye.
For it was in one stark moment in 52 that the writers did introduce us to Super-Chief. A man who was clearly flawed. A man capable of great feats of violence, anger -- and yes, even evil.
But what path was Jon Standing Bear trying to walk? We will never truly know. His time in the spotlight was fleeting. Only the likes of E. S. Pete can claim less time among the ranks of the super-hero.
What we do know is that Jon Standing Bear joined a league of justice. Why would a man with no sense of honor -- no sense of justice -- try to do such a thing? As he spiraled into the great beyond he lamented: "Why can't I do right?"
Yes, we saw him try to do right. With the strength of a thousand bears and the speed of a thousand deer Jon Standing Bear took to the streets as Super-Chief and tried to protect the people of Metropolis. He failed, dismally. Just as others have before him.
And yet, will Super-Chief be remembered? Will anyone remember his valiant last stand on the streets of Metropolis? Will he join the Justice League's Hall of Heroes? Will there be a statue for Jon Standing Bear alongside Ted Kord and Tora Olafsdotter? I sincerely doubt it.
But I will remember Super-Chief's brief moment. No, he was not a great man -- he was not even a good man. But he was a man who took the power he was given and -- unlike so many others who use their gifts for evil -- tried to make a difference.
In that spirit I salute Jon Standing Bear -- Super-Chief -- and pray that he finds peace in the next world. And that the Manitou Stone finds a worthy keeper. Jon Standing Bear may be gone, but Saganowahna -- the Super-Chief -- will live again.
Because I've been meaning to start posting again. And well, when Kalinara and Ragnell have a good idea... Let's just say it's usually a good idea.
Anyway, feast your eyes on my girl Cassandra Cain... Wearing almost nothing at all!
Don't worry, baby. I'll keep the lantern shining 'til you come back home. I don't care how long it takes...
Well done, Newsarama Blog. Well done. You've truly outdone yourselves this time. Asking for opinions on Infinite Crisis? Acceptable. But going to the website of a Marvel exclusive writer like Brian Michael Bendis to do it? Inconceivable.
You might as well come here and ask me what I thought of House of M:
"Oh, Doctor Polaris! Please tell us what you think of Marvel's House of M wherein Magneto comes to rule the world or something else contrite along those lines."
I'd stand, quietly clear my throat, and crush you with two tons of steel.
I mean seriously. Do you really think you'll get an honest, balanced opinion from those guys? They're going to hate everything DC does. Of course they'll claim they're going to give it a fair shake. But such is lies. Damned lies.
The opinions of comic fans are inextricably tied to their own pre-conceived prejudices. If you ask me who would be the winner in a contest between the "Incredible" Hulk and Hal Jordan I would most certainly respond "Hal Jordan." Yes, I despise him with every fiber of my being, but he's still one of mine to despise.
You've been in this business a long time. You should understand these things by now. And even if you feel you must go to the Bendis Board for reevaluation of Infinite Crisis at least get both sides of the story. I've got time. I retired after that crisis, after all.
The cover to 1953's Monster #1:
Horrifying monstrosity? Check. Mutton-chop sideburns? Check. Vague olden-timey setting? Check. Damsel in distress? Double check. What about a clever tagline? And how!
It doesn't get much better than: "He gambled with Satan... And lost!"
But really, aside from the occasional Georgian fiddle player does anyone ever gamble with that guy and win?
You've crossed a line. Not in going over to Marvel -- many fools have done such things. I'm talking about the betrayal. Betraying me. I have a thing about betrayal, you see. Ever since I got screwed over by Luthor and the Joker (which I admit I should've seen coming) I've been particularly sensitive to the issue.
Why didn't you return my calls, Stephen? When we ran into each other at that eating establishment you assured me that you'd get me a role in 52 -- though I admit that the stainless steel cutlery held to your neck by my awesome magnetic powers probably had something to do with it. But I would think that would give you more incentive, not less. How convenient that you're no longer in a position to make good on your promise.
Do you think Magneto will protect you? Is that why you've crossed the street? You think that pathetic old man and his whiny offspring will be your saviors? For shame, Stephen. You should know that I do not fear that fool (and that I predate his first appearance by a significant amount of time).
Nothing can save you, Wacker. I'm coming for you. Whether it's cast iron or chromium steel, you're mine.
It's been a long day and I'm tired, so I'm going to make this quick:
I totally didn't hate Supergirl #10.
This particular Kara finally has a damn personality of her own (even if she's not completely likable) and there are a lot of interesting background teases. It seems that though the "New Earth" Krypton isn't exactly the cold, sterile planet of Man of Steel it ain't exactly roses and gumdrops either. And I think that's aces.
I find myself actually looking forward to the next issue of Supergirl. And for that, Joe Kelly deserves a tip of a hat.
What terrors lurk behind...
Yes friends, it is the least imaginatively named horror comics story ever: THE EYES OF THE TIGER. It has tigers.
Our story begins on a typical rainy horror comics afternoon. Here, we are introduced to our strapping elderly protagonist, Doctor Manton.
It seems that Doc Manton has been called to check the health of a particularly "queer bird." One obsessed with...
CATS!
A shocking revelation to be found in a story called The Eyes of the Tiger, I'm sure.
But we find that not all is happy in the manor of the eccentric millionaire who we will call Kenny Cattler (even though his name is Carl). Doctor Manton refuses to write Kenny off as an acceptable insurance risk. It seems that Kenny has a bad heart (this is a very, very common theme in horror comics). But that doesn't sit too well with Kenny. Though he has no family, he needs that insurance policy. It has to go to...
CATS!
And so Kenny sends Flame, his pet tiger who who claims has never tasted meat after the poor, elderly Doctor Manton. And since this is a horror comic, Manton promptly faints.
My hero.
Kenny celebrates his apparent victory by... Well, I don't know. It's not really a victory at all. But he does gloat in an evilish fashion, thus assuring us that he will most certainly survive the tale.
A chase ensues, as Kenny fires off shot after shot. He kills the cat. And yet...
The cat continues to pursue him!
How utterly eerie. Kenny flees from the manor and comes face to face with...
Anyway, Doctor Manton awakens after a blissful night sleep and wonders...
What would cause a man to flee from a cat that was already dead?
The answer of course is... Well... I'm not sure. These stories usually have some contrite ending, but I'm not seeing it here.
Don't try to domesticate tigers? Don't send tigers after elderly doctors? Patience is its own reward? Hell if I know.
Stay tuned next time for more...
EERIE COMICS!
There are times when I find myself with access to the oddest things. One of those things is undoubtedly 1947's EERIE COMICS #1:
No, what we need is books with covers featuring the scantily clad being menaced by horrifying creatures from beyond the grave (and yes, I know that opinion may make me unpopular, but horror comics are something special).
Tomorrow, I just might feature a full review of one of the eerie tales to be found within this tome. Here's a panel to whet your appetite:
Now that's certainly a title I never thought I'd be typing. And yet, Geoff Johns teases the possibility of just that in a recent inverview. He believes that it's "split" and that there's a chance that Prime could return to the side of the angels.
But I just don't buy it. There are certain lines that once crossed cannot be stepped back over. And Prime doesn't have the convenient "giant yellow space bug made me do it excuse."
And yet, we do see a Superboy-Prime engaged in what seems to be thoughful intropsection. He's considering his place in this universe that is not his own. Could he find a way back to righteousness? (assuming he was ever there to begin with...) Can Superboy-Prime follow the Hal Jordan path and become a force for truth and justice?
I don't think so.
Prime is beyond redemption. We're talking about someone who engaged in mass murder and attempted... Universocide? Is there even a word for attempting to wipe out the entire universe? Regardless, Prime tried. And he had the power to back it up.
Besides, if being trapped in the Speed Force (where he at least had the Flashes to talk to) drove him a little nutty, then imagine what being cooped up in a green box with Guy Gardner staring at him has done.
Superboy-Prime may seem introspective, but mark my words: he's just biding his time. He said he'd get out, and he will. And when he does, we're all in trouble...
I've been enjoying 52 a lot -- that is, some parts of it. Interestingly enough, I seem to be enjoying the bits and pieces that others are enjoying... Not so much.
But by far the thing I'm enjoying the most is the constant wondering: "who is Supernova?" I love mysteries, you see. And I thought 52 was going to be chock full of them. We were promised that The Question and Montoya would have a mystery to solve. But that hasn't exactly materialized. We haven't seen any of Ralph Dibny's vaunted "detective skills," either. The mystery charcters aren't delivering.
But that doesn't mean there aren't any mysteries. As I said, there is the question: "who is Supernova?" There are a few candidates that have been topping a lot of lists.
Superboy: Superboy seems to be a popular choice (though I'd mostly chalk that up to wishful thinking among Conner fans). Wonder Girl certainly thinks it's Superboy, returned from the dead. But if that were the case, he wouldn't still be dead OYL. Superboy is not Supernova.
Mon-El: Good old Mon-El (or M'onel, or Valor, or whatever) is another popular choice. This one certainly seems a lot more likely.
Over at Newsarama, Steven Wacker mentions that characters and concept from 52 will begin showing up in books written by the authors of said weekly series. He specifically mentions Supergirl and the Legion of Super-Heroes, and oh! take a look at the solicit for issue twenty-five.
And yet, I remain skeptical. In the above mentioned Newsarama interview, Wacker also says that Supernova's identity will be (or already was) revealed in a mysterious "Issue #1." That doesn't prove or disprove the idea that he's Mon-El (Wacker said it would be revealed in that #1, not that that would be his first appearance in his "civilian" identity). So I'm holding off on saying for certain that he's Mon-El. There are other clues. Let us examine them.
In that same Newsarama article (a lot of Supernova teasing this week for some reason) Wacker mentions that Supernova is "really, really good" and that the full extent of his powers haven't been revealed. The fact that he's "good" would seem to indicate that this is not his first venture into the world of superheroics (or supervillainy, as the case may be).
He's clearly experienced with his powers, which seem to manipulate light to some degree, but also involve teleportation. Despite my nigh-encyclopedic knowledge of DC's characters (and an actual copy of the Encyclopedia of the DC Universe) I'm drawing a blank.
The other big clue from Week 20 is why Supernova's in the Batcave. He seems to be there for Luthor's kryptonite-studded gauntlet. At first glance, this would seem to indicated a connection with Superman (or possibly Lex Luthor). To a degree, this seems to support the Mon-El theory.
Another interesting thing about Supernova is that he seems to be a little touchy about his personal space. Not long ago Wonder Girl was getting up in his face and he verrry subtlely freaked out. What could possibly cause him to react that way? A lead allergy doesn't seem likely. I suppose it could support the "Superboy is Supernova" theory, but I think I already debunked that one.
One final note. Though I have used the masculine pronoun exclusively to refer to Supernova (check out the torso on that guy!) it does not preclude the possibility that Supernova might be a woman. Wacker is very careful to not refer to Supernova as he or she. Though I believe that is simply to feed speculation such as this.
In the end, this has been largely pointless, uninformative speculation. Speculation, rhetorical questions, and very few answers. Because I don't really have them. And none of us really do. Your guess is as good as mine. Besides, in the end I'll probably be disappointed when I find out who Supernova really is. Because it's the mystery that has me. It's always about the mystery.
Well, that week sucked.
You may or may not have noticed that I've been largely absent the past week. That can be attributed to the fact that a certain contributor to this blog thought he could do a better job of stewardship than I.
So he kidnapped me (he has a propensity for that) and locked me in the bottom of a decomissioned Soviet submarine somewhere off the eastern coast of Russia. I survived for five days on canned beans and vodka. It was not pleasant.
But this week's comic offerings certain were! (Nice segue, eh?) Keep an eye out for the last page of the latest issue of Catwoman. Therein Will Pfiefer shows that he really understands the sort of things that make the DCU great.
Thank you, Will. Thank you so much.
You may or may not be aware that Grant Emerson -- otherwise known as Damage -- is my nephew. He had a rough go of it during that infamous battle when I *ahem* retired.
But I'm not here to feel sorry for my pathetic nephew. I'm here to scold him. There he was, breaking in -- unnanounced, mind you -- to one of the Society's secret laboratories. What were we supposed to do? Of course we had to massacre them brutally.
But that's not the real issue. The real issue is that that was the first time I'd seen the lad in years. Ever since he showed up at that "facility" where I was being "held" for "observation." Ha! And why did he show up then? Was it to see how his uncle was doing? No. It was to whine for my help.
I understand that the boy has mended -- mostly, anyway -- and is now joining the Justice Society of America. He'll be running around with people like the only Green Lantern I won't try to kill on sight.
I hope that this provides my nephew with some important character building. Because if it doesn't take and he drops out (like he dropped out of the Titans) he is not staying with me. I'm not a pathetic softy like someone.
But upon my return I found that this blog's owner has been more than lax in his upkeep of Title Undetermined. He has not been posting! He has been wasting his time doing who knows what. And I see that the blogroll has not been updated in many months.
I hereby take it upon myself to bring this blog into the greatness that it so deserves. We will begin with an update to the sidebar. Behold! Three additions!
First, I wish to spotlight The Fortress of Fortitude. The self-described "Fortress Keeper" has a healthy respect for both the villanous and the underappreciated. I will allow him to live.
A further addition is Random Panels. Little more needs to be said beyond the fact that the proprietor, Brandon, is spending the week discussing armed gorillas (many of which also talk). This is highly acceptable.
And last (but certainly not least) we have The Roar of Comics. I stumbled upon this fine bit of work while doing my nightly Google search for my own name. Carry on, Steven. Carry on.
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