Free Imagine Blogs

As Gail Simone has said, "Valentine's Day is just a made-up day." This is true; but only on made-up days do people give me chocolate! So I suppose it's worth celebrating. Happy Valentine's Day!

So, you want to know which team of heroes or villains I want the Secret Six to face? Honestly, the Doom Patrol would probably have been my first choice. Luckily, I've already been given the chance to enjoy that.

Secondly? I'd like to see the Secret Six go up against the 31st century's Fatal Five. Now, I know that doesn't seem to make a whole lot of sense on its face. After all, the two teams are separated by a thousand years.

But I think it's just the absurdity of it all that makes such a match-up so intriguing for me. Imagine a story where the Six get caught up in some twisted mercenary job -- maybe they're supposed to rob Rip Hunter or something. The end result is their being flung forwards in time.

This would not only give us a great and glorious fight between the Secret Six and the Fatal five, but a chance to throw the Legion into the mix. The result is culture shock at both ends.

Bane didn't use to be cool; Gail Simone made him cool. Bane was a one note character designed to serve a single story. Like Doomsday. Or (dare I say it?) Azrael. It just goes to show you that it's true what they say: any character can be good with the right writer.

A quick update, friends. I'm halfway through my summer language program and it is destroying me. And by that I mean it is improving my Japanese through an intense study regimen. But sometimes I feel like I'm going to be destroyed.

I don't have a whole lot to say about comics right now. But I did read the most recent Secret Six, and I enjoyed a light, fluffy story about how fools tend to underestimate the Six and Bane remains a badass.

Three weeks to go! See you soon enough!

There's a preview for the latest Secret Six up. Yeah, I know that by the time most of you read this you'll probably have the actual comic. Such are the trials of the fact that I post these things at night. When it's dark.

Anyway. I was really wondering how Catman was going to get out of the sticky situation he was left in at the end of the last issue. As far as I could tell there was no way for him to extricate himself from the situation.

I was wrong.

You see, this is why I love Secret Six. No matter what I think is coming Gail Simone still manages to surprise me. To shock me. To appall me. And still keep me coming back for more.

Is Catman's decision as cold as it seems? Or is he simply calling the bad (worse) guys' bluff? I'm not entirely sure... But one thing I'll say... Those guys have no idea who they're dealing with.

You know, I really do love Bane in Secret Six.

Of course, I like Scandal Savage even more.

I hope Gail Simone writes these characters forever and ever.

You know what the sweetest/creepiest/most hilarious relationship in comics is? It's not any of the romantic pairings you see out there. And it's not even any real paternal connection. Truly, the most brilliant character relationship in comics is the really strange relationship that Bane and Scandal Savage have in Secret Six.

Did your read the Suicide Squad "back from the dead" one shot? It was really good (it's Ostrander and Simone, how could it not be?). And there was a fantastic bit of Bane/Scandal interaction in there.

It's a very weird relationship. Bane -- the guy who never had any parents -- trying to be a father figure to the woman who had the worst father in history (and pre-history). And the strangest thing about it is how it seems to work. At first it seemed kind of off but now it seems bizarrely natural.

If Geoff Johns writes the best "epics" for DC then Gail Simone writes the best relationships. Really, all the relationships between the various characters in Secret Six are fantastic. I just happen to like the Bane/Scandal one the best.

There's a Secret Six #9 preview over at The Source. Have I said how much I love Gail Simone?

I really love what she's done with Bane. He's a far more interesting character than we've seen in years. And Catman ain't no slouch either.

Remember a while back when there was a pathetic video making the rounds of some police officers tasering some guy? He was saying something along the lines of "Don't taze me, bro!"

In that last preview page I am inexplicably imagining that guy Bane is holding above his head pleading exactly like that.

"Don't crack my spine, bro!"

I was rereading the current Secret Six run this weekend when I noticed something. It's pretty obvious and I'm sure I'm not the first to bring it up, but it's interesting nonetheless.

The current roster of the Six includes Ragdoll, Scandal Savage, Jeanette, Bane, Deadshot, and Catman. The first three are original characters created by Gail Simone (though Ragdoll and Scandal are legacies of a sort). The latter three all got their start as Batman villains. Deadshot made is first appearance in Batman #59 way back in 1950, Catman first debuted in the 60's, and Bane shouldn't need an introduction.

You have to wonder why exactly villains originally created to battle Batman have habitually filled out the list of Gail Simone's Secret Six. After all, before Bane we had Harley Quinn on the team for a while. And who could forget the Mad Hatter's appearance?

I think some of it has to do with the fact that Batman's villains are by and large more disturbed than most of the other characters. Superman's villains (with the exception of Toyman, perhaps) aren't crazy at all. They've got agendas. Flash's villains are in it for the cash. But Batman's villains -- even if they claim to have other motives -- are driven by their psychoses. These are seriously disturbed people.

Which is why they fit so well in the Secret Six. And why they're so fun to watch...

Six great things about Secret Six #5!

1. The moral code of Bane.

2. What grenades are for.

3. Deadshot's idea of what's amusing.

4. "Get the Shark! Take the Shark out!"

5. Scandal says "please."

6. The expected, yet entirely unexpected identity of Junior.

Well, Secret Six came out this week. As usual, it was really good. Lot's of hints for interesting things to come.

But what was also interesting was the Gail Simone interview on Newsarama. She had a lot of teases there. A lot of exciting things are on the way.

But for me, the most important by far was this:

"After that, we have a story where the Six have to face the consequences of "Unhinged," and I don’t want to give anything away, but it’s got meat-human trafficking, the return of a great DC anti-hero, the split-up of the original team, nudity, eggs, claws, and jeez, just a ton more things I’m completely ashamed of."

Okay, now read that again:

"After that, we have a story where the Six have to face the consequences of "Unhinged," and I don’t want to give anything away, but it’s got meat-human trafficking, the return of a great DC anti-hero, the split-up of the original team, nudity, eggs, claws, and jeez, just a ton more things I’m completely ashamed of."

Well, well, well... You know, DC doesn't have many anti-heroes. Maybe..?

Six great things about Secret Six #3!

1. "Wealthy eccentrics" and "mysterious oddities"!

2. Hammocks!

3. The nutritional stylings of Bane!

4. Jeannette?

5. Scandal reads Latin.

6. "Damn twelve-step-lovin' useless, hippie Mexican wrestler types."

Oh look, it's the preview for Secret Six #3. In case you haven't guess, this is the book that is now my complete and total favorite comic. And since it comes out on Wednesday, that means I will be very happy that day.

Not only will I know who the next president is, but I'll also know who the sixth member of the Six is. The funny thing? I'm not sure which of those two I'm looking forward to most.

Forty-eight hours... Too long to wait...

So I was rereading the first two issues of Secret Six today. (I love you Gail!) And I got to thinking about this mysterious "Junior" character. He's a pretty nasty villain, that much is clear. But as I looked at the few gorgeous glimpses of him we get (love you too, Nicola!) I began to think that maybe he had a connection to another character in the book...

We all know Gail likes to do that sort of thing. We've all seen it before. So consider the following:

Junior lives in a box. Somehow he's able to squeeze himself into a little tiny space.

Junior's limbs are all wobbly. Poor Junior doesn't seem to be able to hold himself together well, and his joints bend every which way.

Junior's name is Junior. If you're a junior, there's gotta be a senior, right?

So my guess is this: the mysterious "Junior" is actually the brother of Ragdoll. I'm no sure exactly, but I believe that at one point it was mentioned that Ragdoll had a brother -- one who had inherited their father's gift of triple-jointedness (I'll have to dig out Villains United and the Secret Six mini to confirm that, though).

Now, Junior may not be a literal junior, as both the original Rag Doll and the one we all know so well are named "Peter Merkel." That makes our Rag Doll the literal junior. But perhaps "Junior" calls himself that because he feels he is the true heir to the Rag Doll legacy.

Whatever it may be, this is all idle speculation. But I like to get my crazy guess out there so I can say "I told you so" on the off chance I'm right...

DiDio! To you I level the following ultimatum: If my next appearance in comics is not written by Gail Simone you will be destroyed.

It is very simple, really. I have watched with increasing delight as the delightful Ms. Simone crafts exciting adventures for some of the most underused of my villainous compatriots. I myself know the terrible sting of being underused. And if Ms. Simone can do wonders with the likes of Catman and the always unintentionally hilarious Bane, imagine what she could do with me.

Just picture an appearance by yours truly in Secret Six. Imagine the scenarios possible when someone of my wit and charm is written by someone with the reputation of Ms. Simone. I will admit that even my powerful imagination is limited in this capacity. But I do know that it would be good.

So, Dan DiDio. Accede to my demands or be destroyed. If I do not appear in Secret Six by issue seven, you will regret the day you were born.

And to Ms. Simone: if you put me in the book I will send you flowers. Expensive ones. I am not above bribery...

Oh, how I love Gail Simone. Let me count the ways. Let me count six of them:

1. Ice cream as a weapon. A delicious, delicious weapon.

2. The sweetest, stupidest gift ever.

3. Cat-Man and Deadshot: BFF.

4. The comedy stylings of Bane!

5. "The bat knows, Blake."

6. I AM READING A SECRET SIX ONGOING COMIC RIGHT NOW!!!!

Some weeks in comics are happier than others. This is one of the happiest. Now I'm going to go read it again.

Not much of a post tonight, as I've once again come down with a nasty cold. I *could* take the time to write something, but I don't really want to put any effort into anything.

That being said, how damn fantastic is the news that Gail Simone is going to be writing an ongoing Secret Six series? That makes me happy inside.